26 Lessons I Learned This Year

26 Lessons I Learned This Year

Last year on my 25th birthday, I wrote a post called 25 Lessons I’ve Learned in 25 Years. It’s hard to believe it’s already been a year, but I’m back with a similar post in honor of my 26th birthday. This time I thought I’d share lessons I learned this past year specifically. It was a year of a lot of change and personal growth, so I found it surprisingly easy to come up with 26 lessons I wanted to share with you all.

So, in no particular order, here are 26 things I learned this year:

  1. I learned to embrace all parts of myself, especially the parts I try to hide, suppress, or deny. In Jungian psychology, there’s something called the “shadow”, which essentially refers to the things we don’t like about ourselves. Those personality traits we wish we didn’t have. This year I’ve finally learned to embrace my shadows and listen to the gifts they are trying to give me.
  2. I learned that putting myself first is not selfish. I finally started looking out for my own best interests, and standing up for myself.
  3. I learned I need to take responsibility for my own happiness. I can complain all I want, and feel sorry for myself when things don’t go my way, but at the end of the day I am the only person who has control over how I’m feeling.
  4. I learned that not doing something for fear of failure feels much worse than trying and failing. I had my fair share of “failures” this year, but I also had a lot of moments of courage that paid off. I always regret non-action more than I regret trying and failing.
  5. I learned everyone has a different timeline for their life. My life might not follow the exact same path, or timeline, as my friends. And that’s okay. I believe everything happens for a reason, and I will get everything I want in life exactly when I am meant to.
  6. I learned that every year will bring new friendships. I always like thinking about the people who helped me celebrate my birthday this year, versus last year. Each year brings so many amazing new friends into my life.
  7. I learned forgiving others and forgiving yourself can set you free. Holding grudges causes so much stress, and really weighs me down. This year I finally learned how to let go of the past, from things others have done wrong to things I have done wrong.
  8. I learned to use my voice to stand up for what I believe in, and share my opinions. I spent so many years feeling afraid to be vulnerable and talk about how I really feel. This year I finally realized people want to hear what I have to say.
  9. I learned there’s always someone else going through something similar. Talking about what I’m going through (on this blog, social media, or in person) can help others feel less alone.
  10. I learned therapy and life coaching only gets me so far if I don’t make the effort to help myself. I’m unashamed to say I’ve utilized therapy and coaching this year, and both have helped me a lot. But they are certainly not a cure. I have to find ways to help myself.
  11. I learned feeling better on a daily basis is as simple as doing more of what makes me feel good, and less of what makes me feel bad. One of the ways I’ve started helping myself is by doing more “self-care” which just means doing more of what lifts me up, and less of what brings me down.
  12. I learned most things in life aren’t black and white, and most situations and people are way more complicated than they seem. I changed my perspective on a lot of topics this year by being more open-minded and realizing not everything is as simple as it seems.
  13. I learned that a simple “I’m sorry” can go a long way. There were plenty of times this year where I messed up and was worried I couldn’t fix it. But in my experience, just saying sorry was the key, and people are more forgiving than I expected.
  14. I learned past traumas will follow me until I stop avoiding or suppressing the memories. I finally started acknowledging, and more importantly, talking about past experiences I hadn’t been ready to confront in the past. It really helped to stop bottling it up.
  15. I learned it’s okay to be vulnerable. People really appreciated it when I opened up more this year and wasn’t afraid to be emotional or talk about difficult topics.
  16. I learned I can’t predict or plan how my life will go. I have to just live in the moment. I’ve always been a planner, and I hate not knowing what’s going to happen in my life. But I took a step back this year and learned to appreciate the unknown.
  17. I learned my intuition is almost always right, and I need to listen when that inner voice is telling me something. I’m the queen of second guessing myself, but this year I started to get the hang of trusting myself more and not ignoring my gut feeling.
  18. I learned some of the best memories will be the simple moments. This year was filled with game nights, deep conversations at coffee shops, going on walks with my mom, weekly dinners with my dad, happy hours with friends. The simple times are the moments that stay in my mind.
  19. I learned it’s okay to ask for help. I’m the type of person who always wants to figure things out for myself, and I always feel hesitant to admit I need help. I’m finally starting to break that habit.
  20. I learned not every job will be the right fit, and I deserve to find a job that makes me feel happy and fulfilled. Job satisfaction is something I’m still striving for, and this year made me realize I need to make it a priority.
  21. I learned it’s okay to be single. I was single this entire year, and I learned a lot about myself and finally got to a point of seeing the benefits of being alone.
  22. I learned I want to see as much of the world as I can. Travel is such a passion for me, and I’m glad I made an effort to travel more last year. I intend to do the same in 2019!
  23. I learned being my own worst critic doesn’t do me any good. Beating myself up always makes things worse. I might as well be my own biggest supporter!
  24. I learned exercising and eating healthier really does make me feel better. It seems obvious, but I spent a long time avoiding it and finally started embracing a healthier life towards the end of 2018.
  25. I learned everyone else is just as confused and scared as I am. Whatever I’m feeling at any given time, there are countless others feeling the same way. We’re all just doing the best we can!
  26. I learned a year goes by just like that, so I can’t waste a single day. Here’s to the best year yet!

Which lesson(s) do you relate to the most? What are some lessons you learned this year? Leave a comment and let me know!

Two Years After College: What I’ve Learned

Two Years After College: What I’ve Learned

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Tomorrow marks exactly two years since I walked across the stage at Texas Christian University to accept my diploma for a Bachelor of Science in Strategic Communication. It’s crazy to think that two years have already passed, but at the same time, college seems like ages ago.

As I was reflecting on the past two years, I realized living life outside of college comes with many challenges, and that it takes a lot of effort to have a happy, successful life outside of the college bubble. Though I am in no way an expert in any of the following areas, here are the top three challenges I’ve encountered since graduating, and how I have learned to put in the effort to navigate them.

1. You Have to Make an Effort to Have a Social Life

As I wrote in this blog post, college was a magical time where all of your friends were within walking distance, and for the most part, nobody had busy schedules apart from going to class and studying. When you graduate, you suddenly realize everyone has their own life and their own social schedule, and you have to try harder to see your friends. Not to mention, most of your college friends live in other places now, so making new friends is essential.

However, as long as you make an effort to make plans with people, while also remembering that everyone is as busy as you are, you can maintain a social life that is just as rich as it was in college. I feel very fortunate to have a lot of amazing friends in my life right now, from old friends I have kept in contact with over the course of many years, to new friends who weren’t even in my life this time last year.

2. You Have to Make an Effort to Continue Learning

As I mentioned in this post, it’s been a bigger adjustment than I had anticipated to get used to not having regular classes. When you graduate, you have to actively seek out ways to continue learning, whether that is by reading, listening to podcasts, attending webinars or networking events with panels and speakers, or some other method.

For me, my preferred methods of education have been a mix of some of the above. I got really into podcasts over the last couple of years, and have also been attending regular networking events with my coworkers. And as you all know, I am a big fan of reading books as well. Though it can be harder to find ways to actively learn in your post grad life, it is definitely doable if you put your mind to it (no pun intended).

3. You Have to Make an Effort to Have Hobbies Outside of Work

One topic I haven’t covered in a blog post yet (but that I definitely can if any of you would like me to expand on it) is the difference between having hobbies in college and having hobbies in the “real world.” In college, you are exposed to hundreds of different clubs and organizations, and though you still have to make an effort to join them, it’s relatively easy to do so. I joined a sorority the first week on campus, started working at the school newspaper the next semester, and tried out various other clubs throughout my four years. And for the most part, I found it easy to join them and was often encouraged to join by classmates and friends.

I struggled for a while after I graduated with finding interests and hobbies outside of work. But I finally got into the swing of things a little over a years ago. As you all know, I joined an improv class for about eight months which was a great experience. After I stopped taking the class, I dove into my blog and started organizing a Meetup group for bloggers in Austin. These activities, along with just spending time with friends and family and trying to exercise regularly, have kept me plenty busy and made me feel more fulfilled in my life.

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What are some of the pitfalls of post-grad life you’ve experienced, and how have you helped yourself move past them? Or, if you’re still in college, what are you most nervous about tackling once you leave and enter the “real world”? Let me know in the comments!

College Grad Ramblings: No More Classes

College Grad Ramblings: No More Classes

It’s been almost 14 months since I graduated college, and somehow it took me this long to realize something. I miss learning. I miss going to classes five days a week. I’m sure that seems weird to some who are still in college and are so happy to be on summer break right now, but it’s true. College is a very unique time when you have all of this knowledge handed to you.

Now, that’s not to say that I don’t learn new things now. I am learning new things every day at my job, in my free time when I listen to podcasts, and even just chatting with friends and family. I believe that we never stop learning. But there is something so special about sitting in a classroom and learning from a professor that I really do miss.

How did I make this realization about missing classes, you might be wondering? Well, my sister and I attended a seminar/workshop thing last week that opened my eyes to a lot, including the fact that I miss learning. The event was called Quantum Leap for Young Adults, and it gave participants the chance to sit and listen to a presentation by Gary Keller. He covered everything from setting goals, to managing finances. I took notes the whole time and really felt like I was back in the classroom again. It was awesome.

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It made me think a lot, not just about the topics he covered (which I could probably write a whole blog about if you all would be interested), but about why exactly that type of learning feels so different than everyday learning. What I mean by that is, why do I miss sitting in a classroom and having a professor lecture to me, when I am getting so much “real world” experience now that I am out of college? I haven’t quite figured it out yet, honestly. There’s just something distinctly different about the two types of learning.

It’s made me think that I want to try to emulate going to class more in my life, whether that is by going to networking events, attending webinars, or something else. I haven’t decided how it will play out yet, but all I know is that I miss being taught, and I love learning.

Let me know in the comments if any of you have experienced similar feelings since graduating college, and if you’ve managed to keep the element of taking classes in your life somehow. I’d also love to hear from current college or even high school students; what do you love about your classes?

Lost in Translation: One Week, Six Girls, Three Languages

“Are you hungry for dinner or did you already eat?”

“I ate a really late lunch, so I don’t need any dinner.”

“She says she ate a really….oh wait….dice que almorzó muy tarde, entonces no quiere cenar.”

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Since I left off last, my living situation has changed significantly. Kristina and I went from being the only students living in the apartment, to having four other roommates for the past week. Rachel left a less-than-desirable living situation and moved in with us, and will be here for the rest of the semester. Next, two high schoolers from Norway moved in for the week. And last (but not least), Carrie moved in with us and will be here for the rest of the semester as well. So basically there are four of us for the rest of the semester, and six for this week.

But like most things in life, there is a catch. The two girls from Norway obviously speak Norwegian, and their English is actually very good. Their Spanish is not as proficient, but it’s not bad. Even so, there have been a few instances this week when Puri (my host mom) said something to them in Spanish, they looked at her with blank stares, I translated it to English, and they talked to each other in Norwegian for a second before answering in broken Spanish. Does your head hurt yet?

To make things more confusing, Carrie is here in Spain to learn Spanish, and is a complete beginner. The quotes at the beginning of this post were from when Carrie first got here and Puri asked me to help translate. I quickly realized my brain has a hard time switching that quickly between Spanish and English, and I kept accidentally speaking to Puri in English or Carrie in Spanish. And the worst part was that my brain was so confused that it would take me way longer than necessary to realize I was speaking in the wrong language, and by the time I realized, my dignity was already long gone.

Basically, this week has been a huge mess of failed conversations and lots of hand gestures. Talk about language barriers. On the upside, I think this new situation will actually help improve my Spanish. Translating may be difficult, but it forces you to think about the languages and really focus on what you’re saying. I think having Carrie here will be nice, because it will give me a chance to help someone learn Spanish, which will in turn help improve my own Spanish.

And even though the Norwegian girls leave Friday, it has been nice having them here and learning a few Norwegian words (which I’m sure I will promptly forget). In accordance with the last high schoolers who stayed here (hint: British), I also took my chance to play cards with the girls. Apparently card games are still a thing among high schoolers. I was beginning to think they didn’t do anything besides play on their phones. (Wow, how old am I?)

Other than the new roomies I don’t have much to report, except my envy that everyone is on Spring Break right now while I’m in the middle of midterms. Although, I get the equivalent of two Spring Breaks later in the semester. And I live in Spain. So yeah never mind, I really have nothing to be envious of.

Your translator friend,

Tu amiga traductora,

Din overs venn,

Shelly

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